Your bedside favourites put in the work. The least you can do is give them a proper wash.

Whether you’re flying solo or sharing the fun, a little toy TLC helps keep playtime comfortable and your favourites ready for their next appearance. No rubber gloves or dramatic cleaning montage required.

Let’s talk about keeping things deliciously dirty in spirit, but clean everywhere else.

First rule of toy club: read the instructions

Not every toy enjoys a bath.

Some are waterproof, some are only splash-resistant, and some need to keep their electronic bits well away from water. Before sending your favourite on a spa retreat, check the manufacturer’s cleaning instructions.

Keep the packaging or bookmark the care guide. Future you, standing at the sink holding a suspiciously expensive vibrator, will appreciate it.

Before and after? Yes, babe. Both.

Clean your toys before and after use, following their care instructions. Even a toy that was spotless when you put it away can collect dust or lint in storage.

For many washable, non-porous toys, warm water and mild, unscented soap are suitable. Rinse thoroughly so no soapy residue is left behind. If the manufacturer recommends a particular cleaner or method, follow that instead.

And don’t forget your hands. Freshly cleaned toys deserve freshly washed company.

Know what you’re working with

Body-safe silicone, stainless steel and glass toys are often easier to clean thoroughly than porous materials, but the whole toy matters, including its coating, seams and electronics.

Porous materials can be harder to clean effectively. If you’re unsure what yours is made from, check the product information rather than trusting a description that just says “luxuriously silky”.

Lovely adjective. Not a material.

Never boil, bleach or pop a toy in the dishwasher unless the manufacturer explicitly says that exact toy can handle it. The kitchen does not need that plot twist.

Waterproof is not a personality trait

A toy being comfortable in the bedroom doesn’t mean it’s comfortable underwater.

Check its water-resistance rating and care instructions before submerging it. For toys that aren’t waterproof, use the recommended wipe-clean method and keep moisture away from charging ports, battery compartments and electrical connections.

Switch it off and unplug it before cleaning. Let it dry completely before charging.

Changing locations? Clean slate.

Moving a toy from anal to vaginal use without cleaning it can transfer bacteria. Clean it according to its instructions and use a fresh condom before switching.

The same fresh-start rule applies when sharing toys between partners: clean between users and change condoms between people. A condom can help reduce contamination, but it doesn’t replace cleaning.

Think of it as changing the sheets for a new guest. Good hosting, really.

Lube deserves a compatibility check

The right lubricant helps keep things comfortable, but not every lube-and-toy pairing is a match made in bedside heaven.

Water-based lubricant is a common starting point, but always check your toy’s instructions. Some silicone-based lubricants can affect some silicone toys.

Using a condom on your toy? Check that your lubricant is compatible with the condom too. Oil-based products can damage latex condoms.

Chemistry is sexy. Unexpected material damage is less so.

Dry before you tuck them in

After cleaning, let your toy dry completely, using the manufacturer’s guidance. A clean, lint-free cloth can help where appropriate.

Pay attention to grooves, seams and textured areas where moisture might linger.

Then store it somewhere clean and dry, ideally in its own suitable pouch or container. Keep toys separate where the manufacturer recommends it.

Loose beside a leaky hand cream and a handful of biscuit crumbs? Your favourite deserves better accommodation.

Know when it’s time to break up

Give your toys a quick check before use. Cracks, tears, peeling surfaces, unexpected stickiness or damaged wiring are reasons to stop using them and check the manufacturer’s advice.

If a toy still smells unusual after proper cleaning, don’t simply perfume it and hope for the best.

And if using one causes pain, irritation or unusual symptoms, stop. Seek advice from a healthcare professional if symptoms persist or you’re concerned.

Even a long-term bedside relationship needs boundaries.

The cheeky bottom line

Toy hygiene doesn’t have to be a whole production: follow the care instructions, clean before and after play, dry thoroughly and store thoughtfully.

A little care keeps the focus where it belongs, on feeling good.

Your toys look after the fun. You look after the toys. Fair deal